Clients from hell

This post was first published in June 2014 at projectstudiohandbook.com/PSHforum

For all their limitations, its worth remembering that a home studio can be a relaxing environment in which to work. A place without stress. Sure we can get a little craggy when our creative ideas don't pan out, but a home studio is somewhere to try out ideas and experiment away from the public gaze of commercial studio staff and passing trade. And with todays technologies, most of the limitations are to do with our own skills and knowledge, something we can all do something about in our own sweet time.

But it wasn't always this way.

In a previous incarnation I was a recording engineer at a busy little commercial studio in central London. The studio had a number of contracts with major record and publishing companies to help their artists and writers record high quality demos. These were people who the AR had decided were worth investing several 10s of thousands of dollars in, so most were extremely talented in one way or another. I learnt a lot from these clients. And sometimes it was painful.

Two clients who came every month were writing partners. One was the artist, a singer in development by a label. They were very talented, young and 'challenging'. The problem was, they simply didn't consider the engineer. Me. One session (not un-typical) ran like this ..

Studio booked for 10am start. Finish at 6pm.
I turn up at 9am, check the studio is ready, demagnetise and line-up the multitrack, stripe the tape with SPMTE, boot the computer, put the kettle on, make sure the outboard and desk is setup just the way they like it. That kind of thing.
I wait. Can't leave the studio, they may turn up at anytime.
They show. At 2pm.
I'm a little tired. Doing nothing for 4 hours does that to you. But we start working. They knock up a drum loop and start playing with chords and lyrical ideas. They write in the studio. I notice they're both dressed in white. Unusual, but hey its the late 1980s. I'm feeling better, a vibe is developing.
At 3pm they announce they are going out for a while. To have some lunch. And play tennis (alarm bells start ringing). They'll return and we'll finish the recording.
I take the opportunity to leave the studio for 10 minutes to buy a sandwich.
I wait. And wait. And wait.
They return at 7.30pm. I'm frazzled and ticked off. But not as much as I am when they finally finish at 5.30 the next morning, get in their cars without a thank-you and drive off.
I don't have a car. The buses don't start running until 6.30am.
I crawl into bed at 8.30am.
A month later the label refuses to pay for more than 8 hours recording time.

The artists in me never treats the engineer in me like this in my home studio.

Clients can be hell.

Thanks for reading.
FairFax